Sayonara

Well, its been an emotional ride. 182 posts in a year documenting my highs and lows, the fun times and the hard times, the weird, the beauty and the sheer crazy. It's been a great therapy for me to write my thoughts and feelings and I have ended up with a open diary of my time in Japan. If I had the experience again, I would do a lot differently, but I will never regret going. It's been an amazing year, but while this blog has been a great outlet for me, I want to thank all those who have taken the time to read it. As I write this my google statistics tell me I have had 3166 page views from all over the World, from Brunei to Poland to Malaysia. However, it also tells me that 2 people have stumbled onto my blog by typing “naked Japan man” into google and a further two from “old lady tractor”!

But I want to say a big thank you to my friends, the avid viewers, the ones that have taken the time in some cases to read every single post. My heart was warmed the other day when I contacted a friend of mine who I haven't spoken to a long time, to which she told me she had been following my every post. It warmed my heart as I am happy it has brought such entertainment to them as it has been for me to write. Thank you.

Should any budding ALT's or for that matter veteran ALTs stumble across this blog, please let me know what you think and if you need any advice about your move to Japan, I'd be happy to guide you in the right direction. Incidentally, I have never mentioned on this blog which company I work for while I was in Japan, but I would like to share with those who find this that I highly recommend ALTIA Central. They are a smaller company than some out there, but because of that they have a friendlier/family vibe to them, which is why I chose them (And because they pay full salary for summer and winter holidays, the company car etc etc). They were up front and honest about getting me placements and where they could place me (Unlike Interac who royally screwed me over) and the training and materials they supplied helped me through the challenges the lessons face me. Nuff said.

And so, the end is here. The last post. I will hopefully be starting up a new blog of life in London and the trials and tribulations there of, so hopefully it will have some of the entertainment value with less of the sashimi, schools and running through the streets, semi-naked. Watch this space!

THANK YOU FOR READING AND GOODBYE!

Post-Japan

So it's almost been a month since we left Japan, but it feels so far away. Coming back to our old flat, with all our stuff, in the same place, with all our same friends, and on Monday the same job too; it's so normal, it's weird! And, in turn, before leaving Japan, living there felt so weird, it was normal!! But because everything is the same as we left it and my life is Japan was so different, it makes it seem like a year long dream. A dream of a life that never happened. I knew this was coming though, having lived abroad before, your lives are so separate there is nothing to connect them. But although I knew it was coming, I didn't want it to. I don't want this wonderful year to feel like it never happened or that I've been in a dreamy coma for the last 12 months. I want to cherish these memories and learn from this experience. I want to remember the good times and the bad; the red leaves and the cherry blossom, the pupils and the teachers, Shoo, Tsuyama, Okayama and beyond; the naked man festival, the skiing, the friends I've made, the food, the life in Japan. So I must keep reminding myself and keep it fresh. I must adorn my flat with photos and memorabilia. But I must also look forward to what comes next. 

Friend or Foe

On the plane back to the UK from Dubai, there was a British flight attendant serving us. Her kind attitude was almost shocking and it took me a while to piece together why. Why was I so shocked by her kindness as Japanese people are extremely kind and helpful, so why was this different? Well, this women talked to me like I was her friend. It was a level playing field and she spoke to me like I would to a good friend. While Japanese people are courteous, there is a distance there and while their heart is in the right place it can appear a little robotic. And while when you do actually becomes friends with a Japanese person they will be the very best of friends, for this initial first meeting there is almost a certain format of formality to a conversation, a level of hierarchy as though to be kind you must be a servant. When British people are kind they welcome you like a the friend they never knew they had.

Paradoxically, British people also speak there minds more. Not as much as some nations, but they don't hide it as much as Japanese people. Some comments can feel a little harsh after living in Japan and of course service from strangers is not always as friendly as my kind air hostess. But on the whole, I'm enjoying talking to strangers and I find the kinder I am the more polite and courteous they are.  

British Difficulties

• Drama: In Japan, people don't really talk about the bad stuff to try and avoid any conflicting issues and TV is all Happy-Happy, everything is ok. But in the UK, drama is all-in-compassing and in your face. I'm not used to this gritty reality and to watch an episode of Eastenders is like all the 'Saw' movies rammed into a thirty minutes segment. I can't handle the drama!
• Safety: Japan is one of the safest places on the planet. Being back here made me really on edge. Be it hoodies, broken car windows near my house or intimidating groups of thuggish looking times, Britain in comparison to Japan looks like you need armed guards. Only yesterday I was walking down Oxford street when a man came out of a side street chasing another man shouting “Stop that man, he's got my phone.” I managed to wrestle the offender to a standstill and we retrieved the mans phone, but what shocked me even more was that I was the only one to jump to the mans aid!
• Work Ethic: I'm sorry, but there are a lot of lazy Brits who will do as little as they can to get paid or live. It isn't everyone, but enough to make life that bit more challenging, be it the bank manager who stuffed up changing my address so my card wouldn't work, the estate agent who tried to blame someone else for her shabby job or the women who I spoke to on the phone from BT who was no help. Come on Britain, get off your arse!

What did he say?

An odd thing about being back here is understanding everything. I mean EVERYTHING. With Japanese, I can zone out and just not try to understand, as understanding takes effort comprehend. But with English, it just flows in effortlessly, on the street, on the train, in the shops, everywhere. Here are my finest extract I have heard in the last few days:

Camp Large Man “...And so I said I was happy to take it from behind.”

Women “With which one?”

Camp Large Man “Both of them!”

They both laughed.

Stuff That Makes Britain AWESOME!

• Central heating and insulation.
• Lots of kinds of trees.
• Our flat.
• Reasonable mobile phone charges.
• Bread.
• A sense of humour.
• Understanding people.
• Sarcasm.
• Debates.
• Coffee shops, everywhere.
• Cider.
• My friends and family.
• London.
• Ice-cream vans.
• Dave (The TV channel).

The Potato People

The first thing that hits you coming back the UK after a year in Japan is the people. The people are so varied; big, small, tall, short, fat, thin, white, black, brown, etc etc.

One thing that really sticks out, literally, are the facial features. Japanese faces are very soft and understated. But compared to that, British features are much more extreme and my mind can't help compare this to the randomness of potatoes! Let me explain: my grandad grew potatoes and I was used to seeing so many ugly, disfigured potatoes of all shapes and sizes, with knobbly bits, lumps and curves. It feels like someone has been playing Mr. Potato Head with a whole population.

The second thing that sticks out is how big people are. Let me put it less delicately, how 'large' some people are! After Japan, its really shocking. The only obese people I really see in Japan are sumo wrestlers and when you see so many people, not just overweight, but morbidly obese, it really is shocking. But it's the same for tall people. I saw a guy walking towards me in town today and he looked about 6'6” and ripped with a tight shirt. Well he looked like some super human muscle man from some other planet it was that extreme to me. It was at this point I realised I gorping and this man was looking back at wondering why this guy was staring at him, mouth open. Awkward!

The third would be, and there is no way I can really say this without sounding racist, but if you are of some other ethnicity than white or asian in Japan, you are in a serious minority. And Britain, especially London, is a wonderful cultural and racial melting pot of united nations. Nuff said?

Flights 7, 8 and 9 – Back to London

It was going to be a long flight and Okinawa to Osaka was just the drop of the iceberg. We had an 8 hour layover in Osaka before boarding our Emirates flight to Dubai, which was killed using the lovely KIX lounge, well worth the 1500 yen to sit on comfy seats, free wifi and nomihodai (All you can drink). A meal later and we were on our flight to Dubai, at 23:30! If youre booking a long flight, I recommend you ask for the 'Exit Seat'. This is the seat near the exit, so no seats in front of you (Don't worry, your tray and TV fold out from the seats). Dozing off and on for the next 10 hours, periodotically stopping to eat something I was sure was meant to be breakfast lunch or dinner. I cannot say enough good things about Emirates by the way. Serious cheap, great service, great food, nice planes, etc etc; or maybe it was a welcomed comfort compared to JetStar (FYI I should mention the problems I had were only on JetStar Pacific, JetStar Japan was totally different). A 3 hour layover in Dubai and onto the next Emirates flight to Heathrow. This 8 hour stretch was tough and there are only so many movies you can watch in a row, but I had the best meal I have ever had on a plane. Warn, tired, irritable and in desperate need of a shower, we arrived back in England. Only customs, baggage claim and a 2 hour tube ride lay ahead of us and the tube ride seemed to go on forever. But I'M BACK IN LONDON!

A Japanese Feast

It's no secret that I'm in love with Japanese food, so being back in this island nation called for a feast fit for an emperor, and my Okinawa friend Yuko-chan delivered with a fish specialist Okinawan restaurant. Sashimi, Tempura and fried fish kept coming to our table, each dish better than the last and Orion Beer and flavoured Umeshu flowing, it was bound to be a great night. I'll miss Izakaya's like this, the food, the drink and the company. 

Japan Retraction

It's hard when your living abroad in any country, dealing with the language, culture and sometimes very challenging views. I now know in hindsight that maybe I should have taken a break from Japan at some point as having time away I appreciate Japan so much more. It's hard when there is no where to escape from the constant foreigness being part of your everyday life as there is only so long you can hide away in your rooms watching DVDs. Even though I love Japan, it's true that distance makes the heart grow fonder. I feel some of my blogs have been a little harsh because of this, and although I feel they all express my true thoughts and feelings I also want to express that these might be sometimes typed in the heat of the moment. This blog has also been a good therapy for me, either gathering my thoughts of venting my emotions. I feel if I had stayed another year or two, the experience would have been much richer, having had more time to study now my job experience has grown and take more time to 'live' Japan. It wasn't an easy decision to leave Japan and if I was younger, then it would have been a no brainer to stay another year, it just so happened that my situations at the moment sway more towards returning home. The first year is always most difficult and this year has had it ups and downs, but I don't regret doing it for a moment. 

Plane 7 – Osaka to Okinawa

JAPAN! OKINAWA! If I wasn't in serious need of sleep I would be doing cartwheels. I love you Japan with your order and politeness and hygiene. Zzzzz.

Plane 5 and 6 – Ho Chi Minh to Korea to Osaka

One word, tired. And next flight to follow...

Vietnam - Dam Sen Water Park

This water park in the middle of Ho Chi Minh is amazing, with slides galore, wave machines and even a moat that flows around in a circle transporting you calming online on a rubber ring. Vietnamese people here are soooo nice too. From the young to the old, they are here to have fun, smile and get wet.

Vietnam and Cambodia - Strange Fruit

One thing is for sure that South-East Asia has some of the strangest looking fruit on the planet; be it the ones you know like dragon fruit, star fruit papaya, mangos and pineapples, to the oddities of some smelly and uncommon items.

Durian fruit (Or Sau Rieng) is one of the smelliest foods on the planet and it something akin to rotting flesh. It smells so bad that hotels ban you taking it inside and is considered some what of a delicacy. I had wanted to try it since I travelled through Malaysia, almost 11 years ago (Am I really that old now?!), so I decided to take the plunge. I wish I hadn't, as the taste is as bad as the smell and I couldn't even swallow it.

I have no idea what this fruit was called, but the inside resembled a sweet lichee. Quite pleasant for a fruit.

Looking half-way between an artichoke and an armed large berry (On the right of the photo), little clue is given to the sweetness inside, other than the give-way name of 'Custard Apple'.

And there were many more besides, including Polemo, Star Apples, Rambutan, Longan and Jackfruit.  Not really a fruit, but we also tried Lotus seeds. Check out the video to see how to eat:

Cambodian - How Many People Can You Fit on a Motorbike?

Five apparently.

And much more beside. Vietnamese and Cambodian people have a knack for being able to stack, balance, strap and fix great loads to their their little mopeds; from large flower arrangements, to boxes, fridges, fishing baskets and lanterns. I even saw one carrying the largest pile of dead chickens in a large bate-ball of fowl and feathers hanging limp of the back of the bike.

The also tow trailers to make tuk-tuks and carry larger produce.

At first its really shocking, but then you are almost overcome with awe and impressed at how their skill in balancing such loads. It's a skill. 

Cambodia - Threading a Bus Through the Eye of a Needle

The bus ride from Siem Reap to Phnom Penh (Cambodias Capital) was some what of a white knuckle ride thanks to a lead-footed 'Giant Ibis' bus driver. It seems in both Cambodia and Vietnam that the bigger you are, the more right of way you have. It seems the only rule, but an important one. A person must give way to everything, where as a bike must give way to buses, cars and lorries. The shiny new Giant Ibis tourist bus seems to be at the top of this food chain, bullying, honking and pushing everything else out the way, making cars and motorbikes pull to the dirt on the side of the road and I figured we spend 50% of our time on the wrong side of the road. Sat in the front seat, Maki and I had a, well, front seat to this motorway-madness and there were so many times I thought “He can't seriously be over taking, can he?!?” But lorries coming the other way were no hinderance for this driver. The closest call actually came thanks to a cow! As we over took a lorry, a wondering cow and its calf decided this was a good time to cross. The brakes slammed on and the cows stood like a deer in the headlights only at the last second a look of terror filled their faces and bolted out the way, barely missing the bus by the hide of ones arse. And we have to board our bus back to Ho Chi Minh tomorrow. Wish us luck!

Cambodia - Angkor Wat and Siem Reap

The historic temple epicentre of Cambodia lyes around Siem Reap with the crowning jewel of Angkor Wat, a vast temple structure, originally Buddhist, then Hindu and then just a palace. With a large moat, walls, corridors inscribed with a pictorial story book and imposing towers, it's quite a sight. And during Khmer New Year the Cambodians mingle with the tourist in its grounds making its quite a busy looking place.

But there are many lesser know temples around Angkor Wat with varying degrees of repair, destruction and natural encroachment. I actually found the overgrown buildings more interesting, with trees tearing through stone structures and roots bursting from walls, twisting and hugging the buildings, almost making them look part of the building and the building part of the nature. Truly a once in a lifetime sight and worth the ridiculous amount of travelling to get here.

Vietnam to Cambodia

An 8 hour bus ride was needed to get across to Cambodia, which we only now know was during Khmer New Year, making moving around and buying stuff even more challenging. We expect a boring an uneventful trip, but with a strange boarder crossing, a stop off at a hospital to treat one of our fellow passengers who appeared to be having some kind of fit and a sudden realisation that at some point our bus had driven onto a river ferry with people selling dead frogs in baskets, it was anything but boring.

The step to Cambodia showed a vast difference in buildings with Cambodians seeming to all live in Shanty town style houses, in an ad-hoc 'shed on stilts' aesthetic. The next few day will be interesting.  

Plane 4 – Da Nang to Ho Chi Minh

Jetstar Pacific, you suck. Over an hour late, but not surprised this time. Sigh.

Vietnam - Hoi An – Cooking Course and Suits

Hoi An is a beautiful place midway up Vietnam, a seaside / port town with a historic charm unlike anywhere I've seen in Vietnam. The buildings seem to have been beautifully restored, but at a cost of tourism with every building either being a restaurant, tailors, bar, souvenir shop or museum.

We decided to undertake a cookery course which was very informative and also gave us the chance to make 4 dishes (And eat them).

And for $95 for a tailored suit, I couldn't really pass up the chance to have one made for myself.